It was really no big deal, I couldn't stand his boss or the boss's wife. Funny thing looking back now, my ex wasn't much different from them.
His birthday fell around NASCAR's biggest race, the Daytona 500 and I was able to get him a ticket and he was invited to go with our friends.
He was like a kid in a candy store. I figured he deserved it. He had a whole new attitude and was attending the AA meetings every day, talking with his sponsor, doing what was right.
So I thought...
He had a blast at the race, came home all smiles and exhausted, all of them were smiles. I don't remember who won, but I remember everyone had a good time. He was exhausted though, he been at the track since 8am and it was about 8pm so he went straight to bed.
Thirty minutes later I heard a strange noise coming from the bedroom, at first I thought it was Shadow, the cocker spaniel snoring. When I heard it again I went in and looked and it was the ex having breathing trouble, almost chocking.
I took his head off the pillow and tilted his head back so his airway would have a less restricted passage and once again called the same friends I called the last two times, the very same friends he was with that day. (I did call his sponsor also, but no answer) Our friends advised me to call another friend that had 11 yrs sober and 911.
The friend I called said he would meet me at the ER.
I had the EMT's take my ex to a closer ER, I wasn't about to make the same mistake I did last time.
The EMT's asked what he was taking and I gave them every bottle of medicine that he had. At this point he was back on the Depicote along with anxiety meds and something else that I can't think of right now.
It seemed they didn't believe me.
Our friend showed up and we waited maybe 10 minutes before being called in. (making the total wait 20 minutes) The Dr. met us in the hall, I gave him the OK to talk in front of the friend explaining his presence and he told us my ex had overdosed on something called Ultram.
I knew that Ultram was a prescription pain medicine, what I didn't know that it was in the narcotic family and that it was a synthetic type of morphine, or that he was taking it. I'm sure my ex knew it was a narcotic.
I was shocked, but not angry. Why? Who knows. When we walked into the the room he was totally alert and smiling, yes.. smiling. He was surprised to see our friend, but happy that I had called him.
I remember my ex specifically asking our friend with 11 yrs sobriety if he had to pick up a *white chip because of what happened and our friend said "no.. you made a mistake"
The ex's story was he had a headache from all the noise at the track and he had taken 4 Ultram instead of 2. We believed him at that moment, I don't believe it now, I don't think our friend ever did.
*(In AA, when you first join or return to "drinking or drugging" then go back "in to the rooms" you pick up a white chip)
When we got home, he actually seemed to be thankful that I saved his life, he seemed truly scared he almost died that night. I think it really hit home a few weeks later when his own sponsor died suddenly of a heart attack while at work.
Things were OK until summer, he found work at the Salvation Army, it didn't pay well but it was work. He got a new sponsor who I never met and still attending his meetings regularly. He appeared to be working the steps and doing what he was supposed to be to get well.
It was the beginning of the end though....