Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Living With Addiction ~ Part VI

Continued from Living With Addiction ~ Part V

My girlfriend and her fiance (at the time) that came the night of he shot himself is a member of "The Program" better known as AA. They wanted to help my ex rise above all this. They had been beating addiction for awhile now and thought he could do it too. He was willing to go to a Friday "Speaker Meeting", I was too. It was going to be a two person battle, I wasn't going to give up just yet.

A couple days before this meeting, I called the house ~ no answer. I called a couple more times, still no answer. Becoming suspicious and working close to home, I went to the house, pulling up in time to see him getting out of a taxi with a prescription bag in his hand.

Needless to say ~ Pissed Off didn't begin to describe what I was feeling. I went back to work fuming. When I got home that night he was sober, he told me he flushed the pills. He saw how hurt and angry I was. I don't know if it is was true or not, I do know I saw no drub abuse at that time.

Just when I thought things may start to smooth out, I got called into a closed door meeting at the office by the company Broker/Owner, the bookkeeper and my office manager. I thought oh no, now what did I do?

Property Management had to tell the homeowner of the house we were renting of the incident. The gardner/landscaper as I mentioned before was scared to mow the lawn and our next door neighbors called the office and said we screamed at each other every weekend. (This coming from a woman that dragged her young son around by the arm all the while screaming at him?)

The homeowner wanted him out and the Broker/Owners lawyer also advised her that it was in her best interest that my ex move out. In looking at our lease we discovered I was not on it, why? I had no idea. I thought I was. Had I been on the lease I could have stayed, mind you that would not have happened, but it was nice to know I wasn't the one being kicked out.

Once again, I had lost control of my life, we had 15 days to find a new home and move. We had 2 dogs, 3 cats and 1 job. We weren't sure if he would have a job when he was allowed to go back to work and living in FL isn't exactly cheap.

The next night our friends picked us up for the Friday Speaker Meeting in Daytona. This is when his denial set in. He was very going through the motions, pretending to listen, doing what was expected of him, trying to fake me out. I was forewarned of this, I don't know that he actually picked up his white chip at this meeting or the next one he went to.

His anger was soon to set in though. In his eyes he had no problem, no addiction. He didn't need to go to those meetings. This didn't happen til after we moved though.

Still More To Come....

Image Courtesy Of Recovery-world.com

Living With Addiction ~ Part I
Living With Addiction ~ Part II
Living With Addiction ~ Part III
Living With Addiction ~ Part IV
Living With Addiction ~ Part V


Sarah Cooper said...

This behavior sounds so familiar. I don't think my first husband had a drug problem, but there must be some similarity among men who are trying to hide something. (Maybe I should make that "people who are trying to hide something." Don't want to sound sexist.)

I look forward to reading more, Lysa. You tell the story very well, with great honesty.

Lysa Napolitano said...

Thanks Sarah, I just it helps someone, even me.

Sarah Cooper said...

Letting it out is a way of letting it go, or at least it helps it release it's hold on you.

I'd love to write a post in AR on why it's such a good idea to write a series on your blog, and point everyone here -- if it's OK with you. I think this is a story that needs to be read, and I think bloggers should know how an unfolding story can draw you in and get people used to coming back.

You and those crafty Codgers have a skill. ;o)

Happy Thanksgiving. I'm having coffee and computer time before I make myself start cooking. I hope you enjoyed your first Turkey day yesterday, too!

Lysa Napolitano said...

Sarah, Feel free to do what ever you like with this! At some point I'm going to point to your blog also and how we wrote about simular things at the same time. Not sure how AR will like it :) But that's ok!

Enjoy Thanksgiving and your family girl!