Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Living With Addiction ~ Part IV

Continued from Living With Addiction Part III

I don't remember sleeping that night. I remember it was around midnight before we got back to my friends house from the hospital. I just wanted to get home to the animals, mainly the dogs.

My girlfriend took me home early the next morning to let them out and feed them, then off to the airport to get my mom. At some point during all the chaos of the evening before, Mom had called his family up north to let them know what happened. She told them she was on the way and would let them know if they needed to come out too.

We went from the airport to the hospital and ICU. We stood outside ICU with the nurse assigned to him for a moment and talked. The minute he knew we were there, the moaning began again.

I asked the nurse if he had been doing this all night, she said no. I think it was then the realisation of what was happening hit me. I don't know this for fact, but I believe deep in my soul he did this for pain killers.

I didn't want to stay any longer, I wanted to go home. I had someone coming to look at the bed to see if it could be cleaned. In this day and age with blood labeled a bio-hazard it was going to be a pain to get rid of it without an explanation.

Meanwhile, my girlfriend had made arrangements for my mom to stay at a local condotel on the beach. They decided no one should sleep in the house. Again, I had no say, and no will to fight them.

Mom had called his family up north, gave them an update. "No, don't come. He is in good hands at the hospital, all you would be doing is sitting in the ICU ward." Thank you mom...

We got to the house, my friend that cleans carpets and sofas showed up, "nope, we can't get that out, best to get a new bed. Why did he do that?? I had no answer, what was I going to say? I wasn't sure at that the time myself.

Mom didn't want me to sleep in that bed, she wanted me with her that night. Once again I couldn't sleep. I wanted to be home. I didn't care about the bed.

We stopped by the hospital once a day for a few minutes. The same thing would happen every time, the moaning when he knew we were close, it would stop when he thought we were gone. We got a new bed, I had to cut out the ruined portions of the old bed before it was to be picked up and put them in plastic to be disposed of another way.

Before I cut the bed up, I dug the bullet out. I was angry, he was going to see it when he got home, a reminder of what he did that day and how it affected me and the animals. We had new kittens, 4 months or so old at the time, probably under the bed when it happened.

I was angry alright, he could have hit one of them in his selfishness. Where was Shadow when he did this anyway? What if he hit our cocker? Noel was in her crate, she was ok...I thought my world had been turned upside down, but things were about to get even worse..

To Be Continued...

Living With Addiction ~ Part I
Living With Addiction ~ Part II
Living With Addiction ~ Part III

Photo courtesy of Deviantart


Lysa Napolitano said...

Originally posted on Nov. 18, 2007
Comments posted as dated:

Kim Murphy said...
Lysa... Such details, such courage! I keep looking for the next issue! Let the healing begin!

November 18, 2007 11:41 PM

Lysa Napolitano said...
Kim, I'm sure I am leaving out so much.. The important parts are here tho

November 19, 2007 6:11 PM

Sarah Cooper said...

I would have worried about the pets, too. Just like children, they're ours to protect.

Lysa Napolitano said...

I'm just so glad none of them were hurt too.